Shooting Stars
by Kaoru Camui
Summary: Wishes left lingering, fulfiled only by a love that transcends even Death itself. A Hotohori/Houki, written from Houki's POV. Inspired by a Chinese movie, 'Fly Me To Polaris'. Reviews much appreciated. ^^


Shooting Stars 

by Kaoru Camui

kamimura_ukyo@yahoo.com.sg

We were standing all alone in the midst of a vast open plain, so vast that I could not tell where it all begun and where it ended. It was a living emerald sea that met the sable sky; a tapestry woven only with the simplest colours of black and green. The full serene moon shone down, high up from the heavens, cleansing the world with its gentle light, a benediction.

The night wind blew across the plain, caressing my face with my tousled lilac tresses. I spread open my arms, abandoning all that had been weighing down my heart to indulge in the unconditional freedom that had been given to me; and like a guileless child, I laughed delightedly. 

  He watched me, taking quiet pleasure in my joy. 

  " It's……lovely. So pure…and untouched……" Wonder filled my voice. 

  " That's why I wanted you, and only you…to see it." 

  A shooting star streaked across the night sky, leaving a trail behind. 

  " Quick, Saihitei! Make a wish…" I closed my eyes and clasped my hands together in prayer. When I reopened my eyes again, he was staring blankly at the firmament, a look of childish wonder on his chiseled, pale face. 

  " Wish upon…a star..?" His amber eyes, so full of curiosity, rested on mine. I nodded, not knowing what to say. 

  " Tell me, Houki. What did you wish for then?" 

  A mischievous smile played on my lips. "Well…I made two wishes. I wished that our son may grow up to be a fine and capable young man. The second one…" My voice trailed off. 

  "What is it?" 

  "I cannot tell you." My face grew hot with discomfiture. 

  "A shooting star…how does it look like?" He pondered upon this, gazing at some unknown, faraway point in the distance. 

  I took his hand in mine. "Like this." 

  Turning his face gently to regard me, I lightly traced a curve from his forehead to his chin. His harsh, stern features softened into an expression of tender love. 

  "Is it too late to make my wishes now?" 

  Smilingly, I shook my head. In a matter of seconds he looked at me again. "I made three wishes." 

  "So many?" I chuckled quietly. 

  "My only desire now is to protect Konan and the Suzaku no Miko. I wish to aid Miaka to summon Suzaku. I believe that is my destiny, as one of the Suzaku Shichiseishi, as well as the Emperor of Konan. It is a responsibility I cannot shirk. And…" 

  "And?" I pressed. 

  "I cannot tell you." Playfully he touched the tip of my nose. 

  I could feel myself blushing, much to his amusement and my mortification. "You dare mock me!" I cried, half-laughing and half-crying. 

  Suddenly he caught hold of my arm. 

  "Houki…" He seemed at a loss for words, neither did I know what to expect next. 

  "Houki…Aish'teru…." 

   He was so close, the words fell like a breath into my ear. Ever so slowly, his arms encircled me from behind, drawing me closely into his warm, inescapable embrace. I was under his spell, plunging into a deep abyss, and the world was like to me a turbulent whirlwind of colours. There was not a single word between us; yet it was all so clear. Hotohori and I, under the glowing illumination of the moon, he gave me the most precious gift I had ever received. 

  His heart… 

  His love. 

  


  And tonight I am all alone. Standing on the same immeasurable plain, under the starry heavens. 

  The night wind swept across the plain, just like on the first night he brought me here. An inexplicable pain was in my heart, as if someone, someone cruel and merciless had stabbed me with a knife and was wrenching and twisting it in me pitilessly.  

  I want to shed tears, cry and cry until all my grief has been washed away. But I have no tears left. 

  There is an emptiness within me, as though I have lost something vital, lost a part of me. Numbly, I stare down at the white rose I clutch so tightly in my hand. 

 _ This rose……it was his final gift…a gift of Farewell…What does it symbolize?_

  I knew the answer to that. It is the only answer I know to all my questions. 

 _ It symbolizes purity, an everlasting and faithful love._

  The pain in my heart grows stronger, and yet I am unable to weep. Raising my head to the midnight skies above, I catch the final glimpse of a shooting star as it passes so fleetingly. 

  _Wish upon a star……Ha! How naïve I was, to hold such a strong faith in the wish I once made upon a shooting star! I wished…I wished that Saihitei would never leave my side, and now……_

  All of a sudden, rage and sorrow wells up in me. An inarticulate sob rises from my throat, which I do not attempt to choke back or hide. Hot tears stream down my face as I collapse to the ground in a crumpled heap, still clasping the white rose in my trembling hand. 

  _Why? Why? Why did you have to be the one chosen to protect that girl – Miaka – from the other world? Why couldn't Heaven just let you, I and our child lead a peaceful, normal life?_

  A gentle zephyr rustles the grasses. Intriguingly enough, this waft is sufficient to make a few petals from the rose fall, and then let them rise again, swirling and whirling in the breeze. 

  But then nothing surprises me anymore. 

  Especially now.

  " Houki……Houki…" 

  I jump to my feet, glancing around me with my red-rimmed eyes. _Was there someone calling my name? Or was it just my imagination?_

  "Houki…" The stranger speaks again. His tone is faint but recognizable; the same mild, affectionate voice I have heard so often. 

 _ Saihitei! Saihitei, I am here! Where are you? Where are you? Please, please show yourself…_

  Then I sense a familiar presence surrounding me. A presence that is oh, so familiar and welcome to my heart that has been ravaged with hate and bitterness. It fills me with bliss, renewing my hope. 

  A quiet force turns my face to look upon emptiness. However, I know that it is him. _Him. My husband. My Saihitei._

  Just like what happened so long ago, he traces a long curve down my forehead to my chin. 

  I open my mouth, but am unable to speak. 

  "Houki…Houki…I will tell you my third wish…My third wish was for your happiness….I wished that I could stay by your side forever…" He speaks like the wind in the trees, faraway and lilting. 

  I know fully well that he is unable to stay any longer; yet I still cling on to the foolish hope that this is all a bad dream, and when I awake, I will find him, warm and alive by my side.  

"No…no, Saihitei! Stay with me…stay with me, please, please…" My voice grows high-pitched with a queer emotion. Is it fear, or desperation…or maybe something even stronger, I do not know. 

  "Houki…I am sorry…I have to go now…" 

  Dimming…getting further and further…

  "No! Saihitei! No…do not go…." 

  "I am sorry, Houki…Ai…Aish'teru……" His voice becomes more distant, until it fades away into the chilly night air completely. 

  I close my eyes as uncontrollable sobs wrack my shoulders. 

  When I finally look up again, the first rays of the morning sun are shining down upon Konan. I open my tightly clenched fists and find a white rose, so whole and clean. 

  Chaste and unpolluted…like his love for me…

  And I clasped it to my chest and held it there, held it close to my furiously beating heart, head bowed gently in awed reverence and tears growing cold on my face. 

  Tears of pure and unfettered joy. 

= owari =

Author's notes: A fic that I wrote a few years back, under the pen name of Chyin Yu. ^^ Yes, it IS cheesy. Heh. Inspired by this Chinese movie, "Fly Me To Polaris", that I watched and cried buckets over. ^^v I used to be so, so obsessed over Hotohori… and Fushigi Yuugi. And I didn't even know what yaoi was at that time. God save my poor corrupted soul now. XD


End file.
